God is Good
“Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the forever.” Psalm 23:6
We have good God and I have always know that, but sometimes things happen and it makes it all so much more real. He becomes a good God that you cling to more and go deeper with. I know that I have shared bits of what God has done in me through my grandmother passing away and again He has been stirring my heart with reminders of His goodness in something that has caused so much pain. I apologize now for the length of this, but stay with me, because He shows himself faithful time and time again of how good He is to His children.
The 9 months before my grandmother went to heaven had been really tough on her. It started by her falling and breaking her pelvis for a second time and after rehab she was moved into an assisted living facility much to her dislike. While there, she fell again and this time broke her neck. Each time she fell and hit her head, her memory became a little worse. Fast forward to her birthday week and she was doing fairly well and then all of sudden after one night’s sleep she was substantially different! (I think she may have had a mini stroke at that time).
I went to Abilene to celebrate my grandmother turning 90 in October and that day was so good! She was happy and we talked and just spent precious time together just the two of us. The next day is when she took the turn of wanting to sleep and not being able to remember anything at all in her short term memory. I can remember trying to hold myself together when I was with her so that she couldn’t see how sad it made me. The next couple of months were still tough for her, but slowly she started getting back to herself.
Christmas day came and it was just going to be my parents, grandmother and myself celebrating that day. (We would celebrate with the whole family the following day) She was feeling so good on Christmas day and she looked absolutely beautiful!! We all had lunch together and we laughed and laughed. One of the funniest memories from that day (which she would kill me if she knew I was sharing this with everyone) was when she needed to go to the bathroom. We were eating at the independent living cafeteria (which was very nice and attached to the nursing home) and so I was taking her to the bathroom so she didn’t fall. We get into the stall and she is starting to sit down and starts using the bathroom as she is hovering over the potty. I immediately said, “grandmother what are you doing? Why aren’t you sitting down?” She immediately said, “I am not sitting on that seat, you have no idea who has been sitting there.” She and I both started laughing so hard that neither one of us could talk or stop laughing. As soon as one of us would almost stop the other one would begin laughing so hard again that it just continued. Christmas day together was so special and GOOD. The Lord had it all planned so perfectly knowing what would be coming in just a few short weeks. He was good in all of us celebrating Him together, good in allowing us to laugh and laugh hard, good in allowing her to feel well, and good in us being able to make beautiful memories from that day. I am so very thankful to the Lord for that day!! It will be a precious memory forever etched in my mind.
This is a picture that I treasure from that day that God was so good to allow us to capture.
God was in good in the following weeks that she was feeling good! She was upbeat, happy, and talkative. God was in good in that when I got on that plane to Zambia I talked to my grandmother and told her that I loved her and that I would talk to her when I got back. (I never in a million years dreamed that would be my last time to hear her voice). He was good in that He gave me a grandmother who believed in me, prayed for me, and loved me with all her heart! God is good that I didn’t struggle with the decision to leave that day or not because she was doing better than she had in months!
Even after the news of my grandmother passing away, God was good. He was good in carrying me through each day and helping me to finish what I was called to Zambia to do. He was good in that the day my grandmother had her stroke, she was able to let my mom know that she wanted me to stay there in Zambia (which is a decision I struggled with and only stayed because that was her wish). God was good the whole time I was there in showing me glimpses of her each day even up till the minute I was driving off to the airport. The other ladies that were leaving the following day as me stood on the curb and waved good bye until I was out of sight. They didn’t know this, but that is what my grandmother would do anytime we left her house. God is so good in reminding us that He is always there in every little detail and for that I am so thankful!
The day before I left, I was starting to get anxious, because going home and not seeing my grandmother was going to make it real. This is a picture of His beautiful promise of His faithfulness.
God is good in that He LOVES us unconditionally, He is good in His perfect plan, He is good in the details, He is good in the memories, He is good in the peace and comfort that can only come from Him, and He is good in all that He does. I am thankful that His goodness shines through even in the pain. Thank you Lord for being such a good, good, Father!
I pray that you will see God's goodness in your life each and every day!
He is a good Father even in the pain!